Viva Kennedy!

In case most of you were out busting your butt trying to make a living instead of sitting sipping margaritas in Martha's Vinyard or the Hamptons you may have missed the joyous news from up North that Senator Ted Kennedy was awarded the highest honor that the Mexican Government can give to a foreign citizen. The Aguila Azteca was presented to Kennedy on July 19.

Now for those of you who know little of the Spanish lingo it loosely translates to "thank you gullible Yankee for providing amnesty to twenty million illegal aliens who continue to suck three hundred billion dollars a year from your countrymen". I know that we are all proud of Senator Kennedy for his distinguished service to a nation who has, in reality, been at war with the United States since the 1840's. The last time such an award was presented was by the Nazis' to Vidkun Quisling who betrayed his Norwegian brethren and assisted the Germans in their invasion of Norway in 1940.

As soon as the award is rushed to Senator Kennedy her will surely display it proudly in a case filled with others awards during he time in the Senate. Of course there is the Order of the Horses Rump, the Cross of St.Guinness, the National Secretaries Award for Slap and Tickle Excellence, his combat ribbon for the Battle of the Booze, and his Underwater Swimming Award. I am informed that Kennedy was under consideration for the Quisling Award in 1985, 1986, and 1987 but since the Nazis' did not really have a voting bloc to which to pander he saw no profit in accepting.

Senator Kennedy, like so many wealthy people, uses his support of imaginary social issues as a bragging point with his country club buddies. These people have no concern whatsoever for you and me and whether we live or die. I feel certain that we in the South would like to present the distinguished Senator our own award, The Order of the Pine Rail with tar and feather clusters would see most appropriate. Kennedy has earned it many times over.